Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Photo Phollies #2 - Unrequited Love

Faux Stories From Real Pictures
It was an infatuation. He loved her from afar. He did everything he could to garner her attention. But she paid him no mind.

Still, that didn’t stop her from teasing him. She lay there, alluring and naked, but oblivious to his advances.

He didn’t want to give up. He thought they were birds of a feather. Mesmerized by her beauty, he never even noticed she had no feathers.

He tried to get on her good side with gifts. He brought her food. He rose at the crack of dawn to get her an early worm. Still . . . nothing! It was clear he wasn’t going to crack this egg.

His love turned to hate and he thought of forcing the issue. But cooler heads prevailed. Long before he left the nest, his mother taught him the proper respect for women. He learned that unless someone actually said “yes” the answer is “no,” so he backed off.

Oh, she was putting herself out there. But it wasn’t for him. She was a bird with her sights on a bigger prey. She was a gold-digger after a high strutting, loud rooster. Yes, she was a cock tease!

That’s the Stuph – the way I see it.


  1. Now we'll never know why the chicken crossed the road. Maybe she was just tired of always having her motives questioned, perhaps the desire to traverse construed as a peck-adillo on her part. Alas, having become the victim of fowl play, she rests in pieces.

  2. The male parrot is listless in his cage. Weeks go by and the owner is worried. So he goes and buys a female companion. No change. The male seems disinterested. Hours later, discouraged, and tired, the owner puts the cover over the cage and retires to go to bed.In the middle of the night, he hears sqaucking and runs downstairs. Removing the cover, he sees the male on top of the female, plucking her feahers away and saying-"I want to see you naked!"

  3. I found your faux story very blunt "the ultimate rejection." Good work.

  4. Never trust a naked punk rock chicken!

  5. Quite the love story. :)

  6. Nice punch line. I can hear the rim shot from here.

  7. In the public eye, he had everything a man could desire
    and beautiful women flocked around him.

    A handsome, intelligent male and had many feathers to his
    credit. But the woman he desired the most was out-of-reach.

    She had been aware of a secret admirer because he sent her
    love letters without a signature.

    All her life, she had wanted love and never found it. Many
    lovers had come and gone but she never thought he truly cared. Often she wondered about the love notes tucked away in her drawer. Alas, she lived and died without having
    known her true sweetheart.