Tuesday, July 3, 2007

Fun In Cars

I wasn’t planning on posting so soon after my first post, but hey, we’re on a roll. Actually I have a couple of stories from the "Stuph File" that I’m putting together because they both deal with cars . . . kinda, and they both deal with sex . . . kinda.

An item out of the Rapid City Journal in Rapid City South Dakota tells of the story of a car stopped by police at about 1am on June 5th. Police found behind the wheel a female-looking driver who appeared to be intoxicated and, at 18, too young to drink (notice I did say female-looking).

The passenger of the car was local alderman Tom Johnson, who called the driver his "helper" at his middle-of-the-night task of personally putting up yard signs for his campaign for mayor.

According to the paper, Johnson continually referred to the driver as a woman, but police later learned that the driver was a man dressed as a woman, which Johnson claimed he was shocked to find out.

When asked if he had a sexual relationship with the driver, Johnson said, "It's probably out of bounds, but the answer is no. Obviously, if I had a sexual relationship with this individual, I'd know it was a man, wouldn't I? I'm not interested in men, period."

Both the driver and Johnson were given breathalyzer tests. Johnson passed and was allowed to leave in the vehicle. The driver failed and was arrested and charged.

By the way it should be noted that Johnson was unsuccessful in his bid to become the mayor. This story reminds me of the old political adage, "When running for office it’s never good to be found in bed with a dead girl or a live boy."

Our second story deals with a pair of Bonnie & Clyde wannabes who decided it would be a good idea to steal a deputy sheriff’s pickup truck.

Sheriff's deputies in Hilmar, California, arrested 30-year-old Tasha Silvain back in April and charged her with stealing the pickup. However, she wasn’t alone. Proving once again that chivalry is dead, her boyfriend and co-suspect, Marcus Schulze, fled.

According to the sheriff's office, the couple drove away, thought they were in the clear, and stopped to have sex in the truck, but left the engine idling. The truck ran out of gas before they did. When deputies finally spotted the truck, the couple had to flee on foot, and only Schulze escaped.

Now, perhaps it’s the fact that I come from the "Frozen North" of Canada, but even though this story takes place in April, we are talking central California here. If you wanted to get all hot and sticky in a vehicle, do you really need to keep the motor running in order to get your motor running? This could be the explanation as to America’s dependence of foreign oil. Rent a room kids!

And that’s the Stuph –– the way I see it.

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